Against all the cultural odds, I decided to set my mind on natural/water birth. Culturally from where I come from, the more money you have the better private hospital you choose with a luxurious bed and decorations. You choose the best obstetrician in town and postnatally you stay as long as you wish. The more money you have the more comfortable/pain-free birth experience you will have. C-sections are for the rich and natural births are for the poor. This is the mindset of my people from where I have been raised.
I studied midwifery here in Australia to learn the difference between each model of care and to empower my people and my generation. It worked. At least I managed to switch the mind of my own close family and friends to help them see and experience a different way of birth journey.
There wasn’t a day that my ability to give birth the way I wanted wasn’t questioned. I am so proud of myself for staying connected with my mind and body allowing myself to go with the most powerful energy of all (labour).
The empowerment behind labour and birth is beyond what I had dreamed of in my mind. I did it 3 times. I proved to myself and my people that women don’t need money to help us have the birth experience of our dreams. We just need to trust our body to naturally welcome the arrival of our new world. I trusted myself and role-modelled for those that are scared and for those who follow cultural beliefs blindly.
I was free and chose the water. With the first two I was preeclamptic and had an IUGR baby but everything still went naturally, just not in water. The 3rd time my midwife knew how much I wanted a water birth and we all worked together as a team for my dream to come true. Did it hurt?
Yes. But the minute my babies were born, the rush of oxytocin and the love and attention I was receiving made all the labour pain and pushing exhaustion disappear. If parenting wasn’t hard I would gladly labour and birth more to feel the empowerment and joy again and again.
I have felt the most powerful, loved, happy, humble and important during labour and birth of my children.
There are times that I self-doubt my mothering and the purpose of my existence and when I think back and remind myself of the pure joy I felt in my heart bringing my kids into the world, I feel energised and happy again. I think in my mind I have replaced the word pain with joy and that’s why I’m proud of myself.
At the end of the day you have got to follow your heart. Be informed and make choices based on your learning not based on other people’s experience and preferences. It’s your journey, your birth and your story. Whatever it is, it’s unique.
My kids are now 8 years old, 5 years old and 19 months old.
Thanks for letting me share my story.
Regards,
Leva
Against All Cultural Odds
